ESFJ Compatibility & Relationships

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ESFJ compatibility, relationships and love

ESFJ relationships

In relationships, ESFJs are attentive and supportive. They are thoughtful and generous people who enjoy looking after people they care about.

ESFJs are devoted and affectionate in a relationship. They naturally pick up on their partner’s emotions, even without words being exchanged. ESFJs are most content when they know their partner is happy and has everything they need.

ESFJs tend to have good memories and they’re traditional, which means they tend to make a big effort for special dates, whether it’s buying a stack of presents for their partner’s birthday or cooking a five-course meal for an anniversary.

ESFJ compatibility

ESFJs are most compatible with partners who are an interesting mix of calm and spontaneous. They are one of the most organized personality types and they tend to benefit from having a more relaxed partner to balance them out.

ESFJs are often drawn to people who have a quiet confidence and they work well with people who appreciate their thoughtful gestures.

ESFJ dating

ESFJs take relationships of all kinds and commitment seriously. When they are in a relationship they’ll go above and beyond to make their partner feel cared for and doted on.

ESFJ compatibility, relationships and love: ESFJ & ISTP eating pizza

ESFJs have a special talent for making people feel comfortable and dating comes naturally to people of this type. That being said, even though they are great conversationalists and have strong social skills, ESFJs don’t usually enjoy casual dating and they feel most at home when in a long-term relationship with someone who appreciates their thoughtfulness.

ESFJ strengths in relationships

The following strengths are typical of ESFJs:

1. Attentive. ESFJs are one of the most attentive personality types. Their selfless nature means that a lot of their energy is focused on other people rather than themselves. ESFJs are able to instinctively pick up on their partner’s needs and emotions.

2. Devoted. ESFJs are devoted when it comes to relationships and they take their commitments seriously. They’re traditional and once they’ve decided to be in a relationship, they’ll be sure to work on it. Relationships are key to their lives and mutual trust is important to individuals of this personality type.

3. Affectionate. ESFJs are affectionate, especially with partners and people they love. They’re not afraid to show their affection in public and it’s highly likely that they’ll share photos of them and their partner on social media. ESFJs love showing the world how they feel about someone.

4. Responsible. ESFJs are responsible. They are highly practical and realistic. ESFJs can be counted on to take care of day-to-day necessities such as paying bills or grocery shopping. They tend to be good with money, although that’s not to say they don’t love a good shopping trip every now and again.

ESFJ weaknesses in relationships

The following weaknesses can be typical of ESFJs:

1. Too selfless. ESFJs can be too selfless when it comes to relationships. They can be so focused on their partner’s needs that they can lose their sense of self. In some cases, they can even start to feel resentful if they end up putting in a lot more effort than their partner and their gestures are taken for granted.

2. Sensitive to criticism. ESFJs can take criticism personally. Even if feedback is being shared in an objective manner meant to help them, ESFJs can see it as a personal attack. Being criticized can be a painful experience for people of this personality type, especially if it’s coming from their loved ones.

3. Judgmental. ESFJs can be judgmental. They are conventional and have clear views on how people should live their lives. ESFJs can be narrow-minded in certain situations. They can be deeply disapproving of people breaking unspoken social rules and not following conventions.

4. Needs validation. ESFJs can look for external validation from friends, family, their partner,s and even strangers. They tend to care about social status and what other people think of them. This means that ESFJs can become insecure if they don’t get reassurance from others.   

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ESFJ love

ESFJs tend to fall in love slowly. Love is a big part of their lives but they’re pragmatic and realistic individuals who don’t get caught up in daydreams.

ESFJs are happiest when they feel cherished by someone they truly care about. They are one of the most expressive and open personality types and when they’re in love, they’ll want to shout it from the rooftops.

ESFJ flirting style

ESFJs are flirty personality types. They are affectionate and sociable, which is the perfect recipe for being a flirt. Moreover, reading people comes naturally to this type so they know how far they can push the boundaries.

If an ESFJ likes you, they’ll want to spend a lot of time with you and they’ll message you frequently. However, they might not make the first move.

ESFJ sexual energy

ESFJs have an open and giving sexual energy. They don’t tend to enjoy casual sex and they much prefer it when it’s with someone they feel strongly connected to.

ESFJs are passionate people who live in the moment when it comes to physical intimacy. They bring their caring and thoughtful nature to the bedroom and they’ll do everything they can to ensure their partner’s needs are met.

ESFJ communication

ESFJs have a friendly and down-to-earth communication style. They focus on the details when having conversations rather than the big picture.

ESFJ compatibility, dating and love: ESFJ male

ESFJs are exceptionally skilled at reading a room and they adjust their communication style depending on who exactly they’re talking to. They tend to be encouraging and affirming with their feedback.

As extroverts, ESFJs are good at thinking on their feet, and talking things through with people helps them to clarify their thoughts.

ESFJ compatibility with other personality types

ESFJs are considerate and loving individuals who are attracted to people who have an easy-going nature. ESFJs appreciate partners who value their caring gestures.

So who is an ESFJ most compatible with? ISFPs and ISTPs are the best matches for ESFJs.

1. ESFJ – ISTP. ESFJs are attracted to the logical, practical, and quietly confident nature of ISTPs. ISTPs can help ESFJs realize that they don’t always need to be around friends and family to enjoy themselves. ISTPs are attracted to the sociable, caring, and welcoming nature of ESFJs. ESFJs encourage ISTPs to step out of their comfort zone, particularly in a social sense.

2. ESFJ – ISFP. ESFJs are attracted to the imaginative, sensual, and free-spirited nature of ISFPs. ISFPs can help ESFJs relax and realize that they don’t always have to plan everything. ISFPs are attracted to the stable, friendly, and loyal nature of ESFJs. ESFJs help ISFPs channel their creative thoughts into concrete plans.

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