Today we look at the best relationship advice we’ve found on Reddit forums, including Reddit R4R, and what it can teach us about love. Love is a complicated thing. When it’s good, it’s really good. But when it’s bad, it can be pretty terrible.
Firstly, what is Reddit R4R? R4R stands for “Redditor for Redditor” on Reddit, and it’s a subreddit where you can find posts about finding a person to date or become friends with. There are local Reddit R4R subreddits, too, so people can find potential dates or friends close to them. But if you’re looking for deeper connections, So Syncd can help you. We have countless resources to help you discover more about yourself and to help you find meaningful connections.
If you’re looking for some help navigating the waters of love and relationships, and if you have a few spare days, you might want to check out Reddit. But if you don’t have the time for that, fear not. We’ve done the hard work for you! We’ve compiled the 33 best pieces of relationship advice from Reddit and R4R. This online community is full of people who are more than happy to offer their advice on everything from dating to breakups. We hope they help you in your quest for love.
Maybe you’re going on blind dates set up by your friends, or maybe you’re trawling through Reddit’s R4R forum for relationship advice. Whatever your choice for finding a successful relationship, Reddit can be a great tool for how to find relationships, and how to make them last.
If you’ve had multiple long-term relationships, or if you’re a newbie to the world of love, we’ve scoured the depths of Reddit, including R4R, to gather the best bits of relationship advice so you don’t have to.
Our 33 favorite pieces of relationship advice from Reddit and R4R
- Starting with the simplest and best advice out there…
“communication is key” – u/TRoller1269
2. It never hurts to take a minute to stop and understand where your partner is coming from.
“When there is conflict, take the time to understand and validate your partner’s feelings before trying to argue or explain. It will deflate a lot of the emotional storm.” – u/dongtouch
3. And while you’re at it, scrap the idea of “The One.” This ain’t a Disney movie, hunny.
“Your partner is not The One. There is no One. That’s a fantasy, a fairytale.
But that’s good news. Because there’s actually plenty of people out there who you could build a good life with, if you accept their imperfections and can compromise a bit.
That doesn’t mean settle for just anyone. It just means open you[r] mind and keep your expectations of a partner realistic.” – u/PoisonSlipstream
4. Pretty good advice for a relationship newbie! You gotta love yourself first…
“Pretty basic but: I[f] you’re not happy alone, you will not be happy in a relationship (I’ve never been in a serious relationship)” – u/TheSmallBatsgy
5. We’re all about focusing on your most compatible partners here at So Syncd and a little bit of the benefit of the doubt doesn’t go amiss either!
“1. Know yourself really well and what you need and don’t need in a relationship. Use that info to aggressively weed out incompatible people.
2. Give your partner the benefit of the doubt.
3. Recognize that when a partner makes you angry, it’s often you responding to older traumas and really not about your partner at all.” – u/searedscallops
6. Who needs Reddit’s R4R when you’ve got relationship advice as great at this? I believe in this wholeheartedly…
“…don’t neglect your other relationships and other parts of your life for a partner or partners. I would say especially friendships, it’s so important to have meaningful connections with people who aren’t partners.” – u/bluegreencurtains99
7. This Reddit relationship advice couldn’t be more accurate. No one wants to get burnt…
“Don’t set yourself on fire to keep someone else warm.
If they wanted to, they would.
And: do you love them, or do you [love] the idea of them/their potential to grow/be a different person?” – u/unarithmetock
8. It’s all about teamwork! Oh, and communication, of course.
“It’s not 50/50. Some days it will be 20/80 and others 95/5 etc. You both can’t give 100% of you all the time the trick is balancing each other to make it through this shit we call life together. Communicate, communicate, communicate.” – u/sar1562
9. BRB, making a mental note to remind myself of this R4R advice during my next argument…
“When you fight with a partner, try to see it as the two (or more, obviously) of you vs the problem, rather than you vs your partner. It’s better to come to an agreement than to ‘win’.” – u/OmegaSusan
10. Ain’t no shame in some couples therapy too. Don’t knock it until you try it…
“That a good couples therapist is worth every penny.
Great therapist -> Better communication + More validated feelings -> Better relationship.
It’s a luxury, absolutely. Check your health insurance coverage (if you have it). If you have access, take advantage.” – u/ResortGrand8755
11. Never underestimate the importance of having FUN! Relationships, just like life, should be filled with fun.
“I’ve only been in one long term relationship, but I would say that it’s both partners jobs to keep if fun and fresh. Do new activities together or start a hobby together. Keep the passion going. Don’t cut out as soon as something goes wrong. Choosing someone is more about a commitment and less about them being a “perfect match”. – u/MELH1234
12. Teamwork makes the dream work.
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“Trust that you’re on the same team.
When miscommunications happen, don’t assume malice. You’re on the same team, so ask to understand, not point fingers.
Make time for yourself, as well as time as a couple. Rest days are just as important as date nights.
Stay consistent. If you make a promise, do your best to keep it. If you don’t think you can, for whatever reason, be honest about it. If this means cancelling plans, try to reschedule and prioritize them, not just cancelling without a way to make it better.” – u/ToraRyeder
13. As someone who routinely ignores the warning light on their car dashboard, I will definitely be taking note of this piece of relationship advice…
“A relationship is not a thing to be “fixed” it’s a thing you have to manage everyday. Kinda like car; if you take care of it it will last, if you ignore small problems they will become big problems.” – u/Blackbyrn
14. Good communication is undoubtedly a crucial element of any relationship. But communication around difficult or vulnerable topics is even more important. Be brave, you won’t regret it.
“Don’t be afraid to breach difficult topics. A few mins, hours or days of being uncomfortable could save potentially years and years of agony. Have the courage to talk about that topic as an adult.” – u/unknown
15. Someone once said to me that love should feel like a nice warm bath, not a red-hot shower. This piece of Reddit relationship advice reminds me a lot of that.
“Everything in the universe seeks its lowest energy state. People see this obtaining low energy state in a relationship as slow dull boring where what it actually is, is stable. People think everything needs to be exciting and full of drama …it doesn’t.” – u/loganswamp
16. As someone who has gone through their fair share of heartbreak, this piece of Reddit relationship advice resonates with me big time. No mistakes, just lessons!
“every relationship should be taken as a learning opportunity!!! i’ve learned this growing up as someone who constantly finds themself becoming someone attached to one person for a while (even if one or two times that person didn’t feel exactly the same way lol). you get to know yourself in a relationship above all because every emotion is expressed at some point. also you learn what you like and absolutely dislike in a partner so that for the next relationship you are more prepared to evaluate the person.” – u/mweidlick
17. If you don’t know yourself and your partner’s love language, then drop what you’re doing and take the test. It can really help you to come to terms with your different methods of communication and showing attention.
“Communicate. Both ways. Listen to and respect his feelings (and expect the same in return).
Always stay civil and respectful even when disagreeing about something. Don’t say hateful things.
Understand his love languages and be sure you are giving him what he needs to feel loved. And be sure he understands yours so he can give you what you need.” – u/WoodsFinder
18. And don’t be offended if your partner needs their alone time. I’ve also learned (through trial and error) that this is just a natural and healthy part of a relationship. It’s good to miss your partner a little bit, as that’s what makes your time together even more special.
“You don’t have to spend every waking moment together. People need time on their own to pursue their own interests.” – u/chaos8803
19. Louder for the people at the back! People’s reactions are 90% of the time about them and what they are going through. It’s easy to forget this one.
“1. Stop over thinking. 2. It’s not always about you.” – u/Stop_Touching_Me!
20. Honesty > everything.
“Honesty is a golden principle in relationships, if you built your relation on it, the chances of that relation will thrive are high!” – u/Olumider
21. This piece of R4R advice is one I need tattooed onto my forehead.
“Don’t try to be right all the time. Even if you think you are.” – u/Soyuz_Pilot
22. No truer words have been spoken…You get what you give!
“You get the relationship you are willing to work for.” – u/Waldo-Bly
23. I love this one. There’s no need to go trawling through hours and hours of Reddit R4R forums trying to make sense of finding love when there’s advice as simplistic and on point as this…
“If someone makes you happy, make them happier” – u/oliver_friends
24. No one ever regretted being open and honest.
“Communicate and be an open book. If you can’t mutually do either, re-evaluate why you’re in the relationship.” – u/j1ggy
25. Being direct with your needs is a great skill to master. Remember, your partner isn’t a mind-reader!
“If you really want something don’t throw hints. Just say it. “ – u/virtual_bartender
26. No words are needed for this piece of Reddit relationship advice… 10/10.
“Just tell him what you want. Point blank, no games, no riddles, hell if it should be so obvious it hurts. Don’t leave hints and talk in code, and then get shitty when he doesn’t respond/reply/get it. Half the time he probably does get it, but refuses to do it anyways because you are making him play guessing games. This goes for big stuff, little stuff, sexual stuff, household chores that aren’t a set routine stuff, and so on. If there is no milk, don’t go “Oh man, there’s no milk, I wanted to make (something requiring milk) later.” As an offhand comment, and five hours later be mad when he gets home from wherever he may have gone without any milk.” – u/VanceCodsworth
27. This feels like a pretty upfront way of looking at finding love! Do you agree?
“Ask the tough questions up front. What are they looking for in a relationship? What does their ideal partnership entail? Political affiliation, religion, general worldview, do they want children? If so, what is their ideal timeframe for having them? What are their thoughts on division of household labor? Stop dating/investing in people who are fundamentally incompatible and then being shocked when things don’t work out.” – u/hajaco92
28. Feeling like you and your partner are a team is invaluable. They’ve got your back, and you’ve got theirs.
“Remember its not about you, it’s about you two together” – u/dallasconsultant25
29. And don’t forget that once the initial “spark” dies out, there’s still a warm, lovely fire to enjoy. Remember that a relationship isn’t worth less just because it isn’t as ‘exciting.’
“If you define your life by chasing after sparks you will never find your flame.” – u/Ronotimy
30. And although it might seem counterintuitive, knowing that breakups are okay is an important element of any healthy relationship.
“1. Don’t fall for potential
2. Breaking up is okay
3. Don’t be the only one who’s trying to make a relationship work. It takes two. Don’t change yourself in order to make a relationship work.” – u/Comfortable_Visual14
31. Living with your best friend sounds like a dream come true, right?
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“My Dad’s advice was to marry my best friend.
I don’t know whether I’ll ever get married, but I try to take this approach to evaluate whether or not I think someone would be a good fit as a nesting partner. Would I consider this person among my best friends if the sex and romance were taken out of it?
It’s way harder to live with someone if this doesn’t apply.” – u/naturalbornunicorn
32. Once you realize that loving someone and being compatible with someone, are two different things, then you’re a step closer to finding meaningful relationships.
“1. Prioritize feeling safe, heard, and seen over being liked.
2. We are not always compatible with the people we love/like.” – u/mmts333
33. For the final piece of Reddit R4R and more general Reddit relationship advice, it’s a long one but a good one. A great reminder that we are all just working our way through life, trying to do our best and learn from our mistakes, and there’s no shame in that.
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“Understanding that just because a relationship doesn’t last, doesn’t mean it wasn’t successful. And just because a relationship has lasted a long time doesn’t mean it’s healthy – plenty of people stay in toxic situations for far longer than they should.
In today’s society, a marriage is considered a failure unless one of you dies.
That being the case, perhaps it’s time to redefine success. Just because a relationship ended doesn’t mean it was a failure, it could have been successful in any number of ways.
Did you get something from the relationship that you wouldn’t have had otherwise? That’s a success! Did you learn something that will help you grow as an individual? Success! Have you gained life skills that will help promote healthy relationships in the future? Guess what… that’s a mother fucking success right there.
With anything in life, flip the script, you’re not a failure just because you’re not living up to society’s expectations; instead, society isn’t living up to your definition of success.” – u/Folk_Punk_Slut
We hope you enjoyed our selection of the best Reddit R4R and wider Reddit relationship advice. If you’re in a happy long-term relationship, or you’re looking for guidance on finding love, these bits of relationship advice are so helpful to remind yourself of. Relationships take work, but if you’re willing to come together as a team, communicate openly, and remain honest, then you’ve definitely got a shot at making it work.
So now you’re an expert on all things relationships, why not see if you relate to these 33 funny relationship memes that will make you laugh.
