Let’s start with the basics: what is intrapersonal intelligence? Intrapersonal intelligence is the ability to understand yourself, including your emotions, values, strengths, weaknesses, thoughts, beliefs, and motivations. It is having an awareness of your core personality and using this understanding as a guide in making decisions, managing emotions, and creating a life that aligns with who you are.
Intrapersonal intelligence is an important aspect of self-development and personal growth. The more you understand yourself, the better equipped you are to make decisions that will help foster your development as an individual and your happiness.
Intrapersonal intelligence is also a key component of interpersonal relationships. By understanding yourself, you are better able to understand and relate to others. Intrapersonal intelligence can help you foster healthy relationships with family, friends, romantic partners, and colleagues.
Ultimately, intrapersonal intelligence is about developing a deep understanding of yourself so you can use it to make the most out of life. It’s not about being self-involved or selfish — showing up as your best self is essential to bringing compassion and positivity to the world.
13 signs of high intrapersonal intelligence
So, how do you know if you have intrapersonal intelligence? Here are some signs that indicate you may have high intrapersonal intelligence.
1. You understand and accept your emotions.
This means being able to identify your emotions quickly and realizing the importance of listening to them. When some people feel disappointed, they might not fully accept the emotion or understand the root cause. Alternatively, they may try to push away their feelings or ignore them altogether.
However, people with intrapersonal intelligence will recognize the emotion and accept it. This allows them to use the emotion as a tool for understanding themselves and making decisions.
For example, let’s say you understand you are feeling disappointed because someone acted in a certain way toward you. You can use this information to acknowledge that their behavior isn’t in line with your standards. This might prompt you to either communicate this to them or invest less of your energy into the relationship.
2. You are aware of your values.
People with intrapersonal intelligence understand their core values and use them as a guide for their decisions. This can help steer you away from making decisions that don’t align with who you are. Making decisions based on your values can bring a greater sense of peace and satisfaction to your life in the long run.
For example, if you value honesty, but someone is trying to get you to lie in a situation, you would be able to recognize that it goes against your values. You can tell them you don’t feel comfortable lying, and if you still feel tempted to do it, you can remind yourself of your value for honesty.
People with high intrapersonal intelligence feel a deep desire to live their life according to their values. In fact, they often actively seek out experiences, relationships, and opportunities that support the fulfillment of these values, such as volunteering for a cause they believe in.
3. You are comfortable being alone.
People with high intrapersonal intelligence are comfortable spending time alone and don’t rely on the company of others to feel content. They don’t feel anxious when they are by themselves because they accept their emotions as they arise. As a result, they don’t become overwhelmed by their feelings the moment they are alone.
Instead, people with high intrapersonal intelligence use alone time to reflect on their thoughts, feelings, and experiences so they can gain a better understanding of themselves. They appreciate that alone time can help them stay focused and grounded.
It’s important to note that being comfortable being alone doesn’t mean avoiding relationships or social interaction. Those with intrapersonal intelligence recognize when they need some social interaction and enjoy the company of others without feeling overly dependent on them for validation.
4. You know how to manage stress.
People with intrapersonal intelligence have the ability to manage stress effectively. This means they can recognize when stress is starting to build up and take steps to stop it from getting out of hand. This includes being able to identify the source of the stress, understanding how to modify their environment to reduce stress, and developing coping strategies.
For example, they might recognize the signs of stress, such as feeling overwhelmed, having difficulty concentrating, or having negative thoughts. They can then take an active approach to managing their stress by engaging in calming activities such as deep breathing, journaling, or mindfulness.
It’s important to note that it’s not that people with intrapersonal intelligence still experience stress — it’s unrealistic to expect to be completely stress-free. But they have the skills to manage it and use it as an opportunity for growth.
5. You are aware of your strengths and weaknesses.
People with intrapersonal intelligence are aware of their strengths and weaknesses. This means they can identify areas where they are naturally talented, as well as those that you should work on.
Being aware of your strengths enables you to use them to your advantage. You can hone in on those skills and use them effectively to reach your goals. On the other hand, being aware of your weaknesses allows you to focus on improving them. You can set realistic goals and develop strategies to make progress in those areas.
For example, they might recognize that they are highly organized and detail-oriented but struggle with decision-making. This self-awareness allows them to be honest with themselves about their limitations and take actionable steps to mitigate their challenges regarding decision-making, such as identifying decision-making frameworks or seeking advice from a trusted source.
6. You are self-motivated.
Being self-motivated is a sign of intrapersonal intelligence because it shows that you are capable of setting and working towards goals. This kind of self-motivation comes from within and is often fueled by a desire to learn and reach your full potential.
Those with intrapersonal intelligence understand their motivations and set goals that are realistic and aligned with them. They don’t rely on external validation and instead are primarily drive by their desire for personal growth. This internal motivation enables them to push through challenges and persist even when the going gets tough.
For example, someone might have a deep desire for financial freedom and, as a result, is motivated to work hard and stay focused on their goal of financial freedom. This might involve taking actionable steps such as reading personal finance books, attending seminars, or researching online resources. Setting a goal that is in line with their values helps them stay focused and committed to achieving their desired outcome.
7. You are able to regulate your emotions.
Those with intrapersonal intelligence are able to regulate their emotions in order to remain calm and make rational decisions. This means they can recognize their emotional state and take steps to manage it.
It’s not the same as repressing or rejecting emotions. Instead, it’s about understanding and working with them in a constructive manner. For example, they might recognize that they are feeling anxious or overwhelmed and take steps to manage it, such as taking deep breaths, engaging in calming activities, or talking to a trusted friend.
Emotional regulation can help people to stay grounded and make decisions from a place of clarity. It also helps them to feel in control of their emotions, which can help to reduce anxiety and stress. People with high intrapersonal intelligence naturally take a step back and think about their emotions from a bird’s eye view, which can help to foster healthy habits and choices.
8. You learn from your mistakes.
People with intrapersonal intelligence understand that mistakes are a part of life and learning. Instead of getting caught up in negative emotions or self-criticism, they use mistakes as an opportunity to learn and grow.
This involves taking the time to reflect on their mistakes, identify what went wrong, and come up with a plan to prevent it from happening again. This kind of reflection helps them gain insight into the situation, which can be used to make better decisions in the future.
People with high intrapersonal intelligence are kind to themselves and don’t let their mistakes define them. They know that no one is perfect, and when they do something wrong, they focus on what they can do to make it right. Ultimately, they accept that you can’t change the past, but you can learn from it, try to right any wrongs, and move forward.
9. You are compassionate.
People with intrapersonal intelligence understand their own emotions, and they use this to empathize with others. This allows them to cultivate deep, meaningful relationships and form strong connections with those around them.
Being compassionate means understanding the feelings and perspectives of others, recognizing when they need help, and taking action to provide it. Because they have a deep understanding of their own emotions, they naturally put themselves in other people’s shoes. They instinctively consider how they would feel in the same situation, and this helps them to understand how others are feeling.
This prompts them to take compassionate action and offer support when needed. It could be something as simple as having a listening ear or offering words of encouragement. Or, it could be more practical help, like providing resources or offering support in tangible ways.
10. You are resilient.
People with intrapersonal intelligence understand that life is full of obstacles and challenges. They have the resilience and strength to face these setbacks head-on and come out the other side. In many cases, they bounce back from difficult times even stronger than before.
Rather than letting themselves become overwhelmed or discouraged by failure or unexpected curveballs, they take the time to reflect and identify solutions. They don’t give up when things get tough. Instead, they respond with creativity, resilience, and a determination to conquer their struggles.
This comes from a place of self-confidence and a desire to take control of their own lives. People with intrapersonal intelligence know that life isn’t always fair. But what good will dwelling on the negative do? So, instead, they focus on what they can control and make positive changes in their own lives.
11. You don’t jump to conclusions.
People with intrapersonal intelligence know that things aren’t always as they seem. They take the time to consider all possibilities before making any decisions, which allows them to make more informed choices rather than acting impulsively or rashly.
They have the self-awareness to know when they are getting defensive or closed-minded. If they feel like they are getting too emotional about a situation, they take a step back and question whether the emotion is coming from a helpful or unhelpful place.
They understand that their emotions can be an important part of decision-making. Still, they recognize the importance of keeping an open mind and considering all sides of a situation.
12. You trust your judgment.
People with intrapersonal intelligence trust their own judgment. This doesn’t mean they don’t take advice from others, but when it comes down to it, they trust their own intuition.
When they make decisions, they rely on their own experience and values to guide them. It’s not that they find it easy to make every decision, but they know that, ultimately, they will approach the process in a mindful and thoughtful way that leads to the best outcome.
For example, they might spend time collecting more information, reflecting on what best aligns with their values, or talking to friends or experts in the field. They then use this knowledge to make the best decision based on their own understanding of the situation, and they trust that this is the right decision for them, considering the information they have at that time.
13. You can handle constructive criticism.
People with intrapersonal intelligence understand that constructive criticism is sometimes necessary to help them grow. They don’t take it personally but rather use it as an opportunity to reflect and learn.
Because they are self-aware, constructive criticism doesn’t tend to come as a shock to them. They often anticipate what others have to say and take it into consideration when making decisions. This can be helpful in many areas of life, from career choices to relationships.
Rather than getting defensive or sulking when constructive criticism is offered, people with intrapersonal intelligence are open to hearing feedback and using it as a learning opportunity. They understand that it can be helpful to hear other people’s perspectives. At the same time, they won’t blindly accept criticism without examining it further first. They take the time to thoughtfully assess its validity and consider how it could be valuable for them.
7 tips for developing intrapersonal intelligence
To some extent, intrapersonal intelligence is an innate part of who we are. However, with some effort and intentionality, it is possible to cultivate this intelligence from your baseline level. Here are some tips for developing intrapersonal intelligence.
1. Practice mindfulness. Mindfulness is a great way to pay attention to your thoughts and feelings, which can enable you to gain a greater understanding of them.
2. Spend time in solitude. Solitude is an important part of developing intrapersonal intelligence. Spend some time alone to reflect and gain insight into your values, beliefs, and motivations.
3. Ask yourself questions. Reflect on your experiences and ask yourself questions to gain a deeper understanding of who you are. If you’re struggling to know what questions to ask, try talking to a therapist or mentor.
4. Listen to your feelings. Pay attention to gut instincts, but also recognize when fear or anxiety is clouding your judgment. Before making decisions, take some time to examine your feelings and how they influence you. If you find it difficult to identify your feelings, consider using an emotion wheel to help.
5. Take a break from social media. While social media can have benefits, it also encourages us to focus on other people and how we compare. Taking a break from social media can help you to look inwards without distractions.
6. Write in a journal. Writing in a journal can be an effective way to document your thoughts, feelings, and experiences. It can also be a helpful tool for reflection and gaining insight into your behavior.
7. Talk to a therapist. An external third party, such as a therapist, can help you to gain a greater understanding of who you are and how your thoughts and feelings affect your behavior. They can also provide strategies for dealing with difficult situations.
Final thoughts on intrapersonal intelligence
Intrapersonal intelligence is an invaluable tool for understanding yourself and making decisions that are right for you. While it is not something we can measure as easily as IQ, it is an important form of intelligence that can help us to grow and succeed in life.
Fortunately, it is something we can cultivate with effort and intentionality. With some reflection and self-awareness, we can develop this important form of intelligence.
