He’s the life and soul of the party whereas she likes to leave a couple of hours before it ends. They’re your classic extrovert-introvert couple. There are noticeable differences between how introverts and extroverts live their lives but, when dating, they can balance each other out perfectly.
An introvert-extrovert relationship can be fulfilling in a lot of ways. Introverts encourage extroverts to take time to slow down and introspect. Extroverts inspire introverts to get out there and do things they’d never usually do.
But if you’re an extrovert dating an introvert, there can be friction if you don’t take time to understand each other’s differences. Today we share seven tips for extroverts dating introverts.
1. Don’t take it personally
Introverts, by definition, like their alone time. They might love you more than anything in the world but they’ll still need to spend time by themselves in order to recharge. It’s best for everyone. An over-socialised introvert is not a pretty sight.
2. Introverts need space to think
You might want to resolve an argument in the moment, but your introvert might need time to process their thoughts. Extroverts tend to think out loud while introverts prefer quiet environments to process their thoughts, so they might not want to respond right away during an argument.
3. You’ll have completely different social lives
You might have different groups of friends that you see on different nights of the week, whereas your introvert will lead a different kind of social life. Introverts appreciate friends just as much as extroverts but they won’t spend as much time with them.
4. Introverts don’t do small talk
Introverts find small talk draining. It’s genuinely exhausting for introverts to talk at length about the weather or the birthday party of your auntie’s best friend. Seeing as introverts have limited social energy, they’d rather spend it on deeper topics that forge meaningful connections.
5. Avoid date nights in loud bars
Introverts are more sensitive to noise than extroverts. The kind of situation that gives you a buzz might completely overwhelm your introvert. And science can explain why. Extroverts have a more active dopamine reward network compared to introverts. So if you’re an extrovert dating an introvert, swap a loud bar date for a more peaceful setting.
6. Introverts are happy listening
Your introvert will probably do more listening than talking, at least at first. When meeting new people, introverts are happy to stay out of the spotlight and observe what’s going on. They’ll appreciate having you to carry the conversation as it takes the pressure off them.
7. Accept your introvert as they are
Despite the ‘introvert-friendly movement’ making good headway, a lot of introverts feel like they don’t fit in. The world is still set up for extroverts and extroversion is rewarded. Accepting your introvert as they are is one of the best things you could do for them.
These tips will help pave the way for smooth introvert-extrovert dating phase and beyond. We can guarantee that your efforts in understanding and accepting your introvert will be appreciated.
And, of course, let’s not forget that you have needs too that your introvert should recognize. Just because someone is an introvert, it doesn’t mean that they have the green light to do whatever they want and completely disregard your desires.
Like all aspects of a relationship, it should be a two-way street. Sometimes mutual understanding will do the trick and other times you’ll need to compromise. For example, you might want to chat after a long day at work while your introvert might want to retreat to their man cave. There will be a way of meeting each other half-way.