INFPs can struggle when it comes to dating. We are complex individuals, and we rarely meet people with whom we connect in a meaningful way. We need a lot of alone time, and meeting new people can be draining for us. Plus, we value intense, deep connections with a select number of people.
However, INFPs are some of the most enigmatic people you’ll ever meet. We are open-minded and spontaneous, which is the perfect recipe for a host of fun adventures. Additionally, we have a wide range of interests, and we are never short of things to talk about.
In this post, we run through 31 things you need to know when dating an INFP. If you’re dating an INFP or are curious about what makes them tick, read on.
1. We are always in our own world.
INFPs are daydreamers by nature, and we often get lost in our own thoughts. If you’re dating an INFP, don’t be surprised if we zone out from time to time. Just know that we’re usually thinking about something deep, even if it doesn’t seem like it at first.
2. We are passionate about our beliefs.
We just care so much. INFPs are some of the most idealistic and principled individuals. We have strong convictions and always stand up for what we believe in. In fact, we will always do the right thing, even when it’s not popular or easy. So, be prepared to have some intense conversations about ethics and morality.
3. We are always ready for an adventure.
INFPs are known for their gentleness, but when you get to know us, you’ll discover that we have a quiet strength. We are naturally empathetic people, and we often go out of our way to help others, even if we don’t know them well. At the same time, we have an inner resilience that few people get to see.
4. We are extremely loyal.
Once we commit to someone, we are in it for the long haul, and we will put in the effort to work on any issues that might arise. We are some of the most loyal and supportive partners you’ll ever find. If you’re dating an INFP, you can rest assured that we will always be there for you, no matter what.
5. We are gentle but fierce.
INFPs are known for their gentleness, but when you get to know us, you’ll discover that we have a resilient side. We are naturally empathetic people, and we often go out of our way to help others, even if we don’t know them well. At the same time, we have a quiet strength that few people get to see.
6. We are always looking for the good in people.
INFPs are idealistic and optimistic people. We always see the best in others, even when no one else does. We often have a lot of faith in the goodness of humanity, and we are always ready to give people the benefit of the doubt unless they cross our boundaries.
7. We are very private.
Despite seeming warm when you meet them, INFPs are extremely private people who don’t like to share too much about themselves with others. If you’re dating an INFP, don’t expect them to open up to you right away. It takes time for them to trust someone enough to let them in.
8. We are great listeners.
INFPs are excellent listeners, and we’re always willing to lend a sympathetic ear. If you’re dating an INFP, don’t be surprised if we want to talk about your problems for hours on end. We just want to help however we can, and we have a deep, genuine interest in people and human psychology.
9. We feel everything deeply but struggle to express our emotions.
INFPs are very emotionally aware, and we feel everything very deeply. Beneath our calm exterior is a well of emotions. However, we can find it hard to express what we’re feeling, and it takes us a while to feel comfortable enough to do that.
10. We are extremely empathetic.
INFPs are known for their altruism and desire to help others. This stems from our deeply empathetic nature, and we feel other people’s emotions as if they were our own. One of the reasons why we are so empathetic is that we are highly aware of our own emotions, which makes us able to relate to how other people feel if we put ourselves in their shoes.
11. We are a little quirky.
We have wild imaginations, and we don’t care for social norms. We believe that everyone should have the right to be their authentic selves, and this can lead to us being seen as quirky or strange. Additionally, we often have unusual interests, and our brains jump quickly from one topic to another.
12. We are great at giving advice.
INFPs are excellent at giving advice because we understand people on a deep level, and we take time to introspect about situations. If you’re dating an INFP, don’t be surprised if we want to talk through your problems and brainstorm solutions.
13. We have busy minds and can be forgetful.
We are always seeking to understand the underlying meaning behind things around us and aren’t content with simply taking things at face value. Our minds are racing at 100mph, and we can sometimes forget things because we get lost in our thoughts.
14. We are great at giving compliments.
INFPs are very good at giving compliments because we genuinely see the best in others. If you’re dating an INFP, don’t be surprised if we constantly tell you how much we appreciate you. It’s just our way of showing how much we care. But that will likely come later on in the relationship because it takes us time to get to the point where we feel comfortable expressing ourselves.
15. We are terrible at taking compliments.
INFPs are notoriously bad at taking compliments. We often downplay our own accomplishments. If you’re dating an INFP, don’t take it personally if we seem uninterested in your compliments. We do appreciate them; it’s just that we have a hard time accepting them in the moment.
16. We are easily distracted.
We are intrigued by many different topics, even on a daily basis, and we can find it difficult to stick to just one thing. In fact, we often struggle to focus on any one task for an extended period of time and admire people who have the ability to do that (we’re looking at you, ENTJs and ESTJs).
17. We need a lot of alone time.
As introverts, we need a lot of alone time to recharge our batteries. When we’re with people, we have the ability to come across as social, and we can even be mistaken for extroverts. But we can’t be in that mode for very long. If you’re dating an INFP, don’t take it personally if they want to spend a lot of time alone. It’s just how we operate best.
18. We are very independent.
INFPs are very independent people, and we like to do things our own way. We value having a sense of freedom, and there’s nothing worse we can think of than being smothered. If you’re dating an INFP, don’t try to control them or tell them what to do. We’ll only rebel against it.
19. We have strong boundaries.
Because we are so self-aware and in touch with our feelings, we know exactly where our limits lie. Additionally, we are very clear on what we believe to be right and wrong. We will be supportive and caring, but if we feel like you have disrespected our boundaries, we will simply just walk away.
20. We have a deep desire to feel understood.
INFPs go through life feeling misunderstood. We are looking for a partner who understands us on a deep level. If you want to attract an INFP, show that you truly get them. We get that we are a little quirky, and we are looking for someone who accepts us for who we are.
21. We have a hard time dealing with conflict.
INFPs are peacemakers by nature, and we hate conflict. If you’re dating an INFP, be prepared for them to try to avoid arguments or confrontations. Even if we know it’s necessary, we would much rather keep the peace than deal with conflict.
22. We value trust above all else.
INFPs value trust above all else in a relationship. If you’re dating an INFP, be prepared to build a foundation of trust before anything else can happen. Without trust, we will not feel comfortable opening up to you.
23. We are always growing and changing.
We love to learn and we take a lot of time to introspect. As a result, we’re constantly growing. Additionally, we’re always seeking new experiences and adventures, which helps us to grow as individuals.
24. We will never stop trying to understand you.
Truly, we want you to feel understood and accepted. INFPs are curious individuals who love to learn about all kinds of things, and we like to delve deeper into the minds of those we care about. If you’re dating an INFP, don’t be surprised if we ask you a lot of questions.
25. We need a partner who is willing to listen.
INFPs need a partner who is willing to listen to them and really hear what they’re saying. If you’re dating an INFP, know that we appreciate it when you take the time to listen to us. It’s the only way we’ll feel truly understood.
26. We sometimes have a hard time fitting in.
We’re unusual people and don’t conform to societal norms or expectations. Instead, we march to the beat of our drum and embrace our individuality. Plus, we’re introverts who prefer deep conversations over small talk, which can make it difficult to connect with others.
27. We have strong morals.
ISFPs have a strong sense of right and wrong. We believe in justice, and we’re quick to stand up for the underdog. Morals are important to us, and we are very clear on our principles. At the same time, we appreciate that other people have different perspectives.
28. We sometimes need help with practical matters.
INFPs are known for being impractical and disorganized. We tend to focus on the big picture we can struggle with day-to-day practicalities. As a result, we appreciate someone who can help us with things like this.
29. We have wild imaginations.
INFPs are extremely intuitive, and we have a rich inner life. We are creative and see the world in a different way. This can be both a good and bad thing, as it can lead to great ideas but also flights of fancy that may not be grounded in reality.
30. We live and let live.
We believe that everyone should be free to live their life the way they want to. In addition, we don’t like to judge people, and we generally believe that people should be allowed to do whatever makes them happy as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone else. If you’re dating an INFP, they will likely support you in taking all kinds of different paths.
31. We are looking for that extra special connection.
We won’t settle for anything less than a truly special connection. This is partly due to our idealistic nature, which means we are always looking for the best, particularly when it comes to relationships. So if you’re dating an INFP, there’s a good chance that they really like you.
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We hope this provides insight into what makes INFPs tick and helps make your relationship a little smoother. Remember, we’re all unique individuals, so not everything on this list will apply to every INFP, but it should give you a good starting point.
If you haven’t already, be sure to check out our other post on INFP compatibility. Or perhaps you’re an INFP, and you’d like your partner to understand you on a deeper level? Share this post with them and see what they think.