Dating a gamer can be a lot of fun, but it also comes with its own set of challenges. If you’re not familiar with the gaming world, it can be difficult to understand what your partner is talking about, or how to relate to them. That’s why we’ve put together this list of 10 tips for dating a gamer!
If you’re dating a gamer, then you’ll know that it’s a balancing act between forcing them to spend some time with you, away from the console, but also taking an interest in gaming and joining them. Taking an interest in your partner’s interests is a vital part of any relationship, and even more so when it comes to dating a gamer. So, read on to discover our top 10 tips for dating a gamer…
Dating a Gamer: Top 10 Tips
1. Take interest in the games your partner enjoys playing.
Maybe you’re more of an Elder Scrolls person than a Skyrim person, or maybe you have no idea what either of those two words means. Either way, if you are dating a gamer, then you’re best off starting to learn about the games your date is into. Showing interest in your partner’s hobbies is hugely beneficial in any relationship and helps to create a spark. Even if you think you aren’t that interested in video games, you never know until you ask!
2. Set boundaries.
Boundaries are important for everyone. Expressing your needs to your partner is an excellent way to make sure both people feel listened to and respected. This same rule applies when it comes to dating a gamer. It’s all too easy for most gamers to stay inside whiling away the hours on their own in front of the monitor. You should start as you mean to go on, and if you need more time with your partner, then it’s good to set those boundaries early on. This doesn’t mean you have to hide their game console under lock and key. It just means that you need to work out a compromise — find a happy medium that works for both of you. If they spend the morning gaming, then you can meet in the afternoon to head out for a walk and some lunch. Sounds like a good deal to me!
3. Don’t be afraid to try out some of their favorite games.
Sure, maybe you’re not much of a God of War fan, but that doesn’t mean you wouldn’t enjoy a bit of Tomb Raider. Or what about Need for Speed? If you’re dating a gamer, it’s good to bear in mind that you might actually enjoy some of their games. Why not give them a go and see? You might even find it fun gaming together, or maybe you’ll discover you’re pretty good!
4. Avoid criticizing their love of gaming or making fun of them.
All too often, gaming is ridiculed or belittled by others as being ‘childish’ or ‘nerdy.’ Try to avoid these terms if you’re dating a gamer. Many people who consider themselves gamers feel many benefits of gaming. For example, it might give them a form of escapism or nurture a sense of creativity. Gaming is something your partner feels passionately about, and they will (whether you like it or not!) spend a lot of their time doing it. Rejecting this hobby in any way won’t do either of you any good. So forget any of that prejudice you might have about gaming. Understand it for the meaningful, creative, and valid passion that it is, and respect the person you’re dating for their hobby. Being respectful of each other is essential for any healthy relationship.
5. Show interest in their non-gaming hobbies too.
Just because your partner loves gaming doesn’t mean they don’t have other interests as well! Be sure to show interest in their other hobbies and activities, and spend time engaging in conversations about things that aren’t related to gaming at all. That way, you’ll both get a chance to share things you’re passionate about and connect in other ways than just gaming. And if your partner is struggling to talk about other things, make sure to encourage them to also appreciate other things in their life. This comes back to point 2 — setting those boundaries!
6. Understand they might need their alone time.
It’s natural for gamers to need a lot of alone time. It’s important that you respect their need for alone time, just as they should respect your need for them to put the controller down and spend time with you. It can be easy to think that you need to march in there and forcibly drag them away from the monitor, but the opposite is, in fact, true.
7. Appreciate that gaming doesn’t completely define their personality.
Don’t fall into the ‘nerdy-loner’ stereotype. Just because they enjoy gaining doesn’t mean that’s all there is to their personality. They may enjoy other things, possibly more than gaming, as well. Take the time to get to know your date better. It’s highly likely they have lots of other interests too! Gamers are highly likely to be creative dreamers. In fact, we found that they are most likely to be INTP, ENTP or INFJ personality types. Never assume that gaming is all your partner does (even if they do it for 4 hours every day!). They’re so much more than that.
8. Gamers are usually very patient.
Dating a gamer will make you realize that gamers sure are patient. Whether it’s connection issues, lag problems, working with weak players, or constantly missing out on completing that tricky boss level, one thing is for certain: gamers are dedicated and patient individuals. This means you can pretty much assume that they won’t be phased by much. Can’t decide where to go for dinner? No worries. Taking your sweet time to leave the house because you keep forgetting something? That’s fine! Gamers are usually chilled-out people, so make sure you go into the relationship with this in mind. It can be really helpful to understand your partner’s personality and how they work to see how your behavior can complement. Why not get them to take our 5-minute personality test to discover more about their personality?
9. Communicate your needs instead of trying to cut them off
All relationships are about compromise. It’s just an inevitable part of life. However, compromise doesn’t have to be a bad thing. It’s all about finding solutions that work for both people, making everyone happy, and overcoming issues in a healthy manner. People who are in relationships with gamers can often get frustrated at feeling like they “come second” to gaming. It’s tempting to throw the towel in and walk away from this without really telling the other person how you feel, but it’s time to use this as a learning curve, my friend! Instead of holding it in and then exploding later on, why don’t you communicate with your partner how you need to set some boundaries? This will make you feel better and will give your partner an opportunity to spend some quality time with you. Win-win!
10. Use that alone time for yourself.
Instead of sitting around waiting for your partner to finish their gaming session, why not utilize this rare spare time and spend it doing something that makes you happy? Is there a hobby you’ve been wanting to get into? An exercise class that’s been on your list forever? Or maybe a movie you know they wouldn’t enjoy but you’re dying to see? Now’s the time to make the most of this opportunity and do something for yourself. If you feel energized from enjoying your own hobby, the time spent with your partner will be even better.
Share this post with other people who are dating gamers
We hope you enjoyed these 10 tips for dating a gamer! Dating can be tricky, but once you find someone who is on your wavelength, and who is a perfect match for your personality, there’s nothing that can compare. Taking an interest in your partner’s games (even if you think you would just be rubbish) is just as important as making the most of the time you have to yourself (whilst they are busy gaming). As long as you both communicate your needs effectively, respect each other’s time, and have fun together, you’re laying a foundation for great things!
You might also want to check out Dating for Gamers: Top 10 Tips or Here’s What Reddit Relationship Advice Can Teach Us About Love.
