In relationships, INTJs are loyal and independent. They are measured and logical people who never fail to have a backup plan (or five). INTJs are most compatible with partners who are honest and intelligent. They are one of the most strategic personality types and they have a clear idea of what they want in a partner. INTJs need a deep connection in order to feel a sense of true compatibility and love.
INTJs are most compatible with partners who are trustworthy and easy-going. Being able to fully trust their partner is essential for people of this personality type. INTJs aren’t the type to play games and they place little importance on traditions such as Valentine’s Day or anniversaries. They are attracted to people who have a spontaneous and playful side.
INTJs are steadfast and devoted in a relationship…they can always be counted on. They find casual dating exhausting and would much prefer a long-term partner with whom they share a meaningful connection.
INTJs always think for ahead and if they don’t see the potential for a lasting relationship, they’ll see it as a waste of time. If an INTJ is spending time with you, you can be sure that they like you. Attraction for INTJs goes far beyond the surface and they show love by helping their partner achieve their goals.
INTJ strengths in relationships
The following strengths are typical of INTJs in relationships:
1. Loyal. INTJs are one of the most loyal personality types. They have a knack for working things out and solving problems. They follow through on their plans because…why wouldn’t they? They’ll only say they’ll do something if they mean it because that’s what makes most logical sense to them. They see it as both practical and ethical.
2. Pragmatic. INTJs are pragmatic personality types. They take a logical approach to most things and are unlikely to overreact. INTJs are good at handling criticism and if you give them feedback, they’ll look at it objectively and work out whether they think it’s something worth changing or working on.
3. Quietly confident. INTJs have a quiet confidence. They carefully consider different options before deciding on a path, so when they do decide something, they are confident in their decision. INTJs are often highly accomplished due to their mixture of raw intelligence and strategic nature but they aren’t ones to go shouting about their successes.
4. Independent. INTJs are highly independent individuals. Of course, they do appreciate affection but they also enjoy having their own space and spending time alone to recharge. INTJs will offer the same in return and they aren’t going to be the type to completely smother their partners.
INTJ weaknesses in relationships
The following weaknesses can be typical of INTJs in relationships:
1. Closed-minded. INTJs can be closed-minded in certain situations. When they think they’re right, it can be hard to get them to see different perspectives. This is because INTJs will have carefully considered everything before coming to a conclusion, but this doesn’t mean that they can’t be wrong.
2. Insensitive. INTJs can be insensitive and find it difficult to offer emotional support. They are exceptionally logical and can find it hard to deal with partners who have emotional outbursts and if this happens frequently, they can lose respect for them. This can make their partners feel unloved.
3. Very private. INTJs are one of the most private personality types. They feel little need to share even small details of their lives, let alone big details. INTJs tend to avoid small talk. They can live without drawn-out conversations about your second cousin’s birthday party because…what’s the point? They do share aspects of their lives with their partners though, but it takes them a long time to fully open up.
4. Perfectionists. INTJs can be perfectionists when it comes to love. They have extremely high standards for everything they do in life and dating is no exception. They have a clear vision of what they want in a partner, which isn’t a bad thing in itself, but they sometimes don’t give people a chance because they don’t meet all of their criteria, or they foresee a problem that might arise years down the line.
INTJs fall in love slowly compared to most other personality types. They are cautious people in general and even more so when it comes to one of the greatest risks of all: love. INTJs rarely meet people who they see a future with and when they do meet someone who ticks all their boxes, they’ll cherish them and be a completely devoted partner.
INTJs are not particularly flirty individuals. They tend to be direct and the nuances of flirting don’t come naturally to them. However, if an INTJ likes you, they’ll ask a lot of questions to try and determine if you’d be a good match long-term. They like to plan far into the future and they won’t waste their time with someone they don’t think is right.
INTJ sexual compatibility
INTJs are intense and passionate lovers with the right person. They don’t tend to enjoy casual sex for a number of reasons, including the health risks, and they value having a meaningful connection with someone. Sexual attraction and compatibility are based on more than just looks for INTJs and they need an intellectual connection in order to feel deeply attracted to their partner.
INTJs have a direct communication style and they certainly aren’t afraid to challenge people, especially if they think that they’re wrong.
INTJs are unlikely to share details of their life unless they’re directly asked, and even then, they’ll sometimes avoid the question. They are objective and are able to explain their reasoning in a measured and logical manner. INTJs like to get to the point right away and they can get frustrated by people who beat around the bush as they see it as inefficient.
INTJ compatibility with other personality types
1. INTJ – ENFP relationships. INTJs are attracted to the playful, fun, and open nature of ENFPs. ENFPs encourage INTJs to step out of their comfort zone and try new things. They are attracted to the intellectual, determined, and measured nature of INTJs. ENFPs are brimming with new ideas and INTJs can help ENFPs channel them into real plans.
2. INTJ – ENTP relationships. INTJs are attracted to the dynamic, creative, and enthusiastic nature of ENTPs. ENTPs introduce INTJs to new ideas which makes for interesting conversations. ENTPs are attracted to the intellectual, intense, and strong-minded nature of INTJs. INTJs can keep ENTPs interested and they know exactly how to handle them.